Kagerou Swap
by Kvroi
Summary: Azami gets a cold, which leaves the Mekakushi-dan with each other's Eye Abilities!
1. Chapter 1

**You know that poll on my profile? Yeah, well I decided to turn it into a fic, because it wasn't getting many votes. But now I'm in my evil mood, and ready to wreck some Mekakushi-dan with EACH OTHER'S Eye Abilities.**

 **They'll hate me.**

* * *

Azami lay on the bed in Marry's room, holding a box of tissues on her lap.

She had a bag of ice on her head, which slid back as she gave a girly little sneeze.

She was told she had what the Humans called "a cold."

 _If I'm cold, why did they give me this?_

She threw the ice weakly across the room.

"Azami... Here's this for you!"

Marry walked in, holding a thermometer.

"What do I-Achiiw!- D-do with it?"

Azami took the glass rod and sized it up.

"It goes in your mouth..."

Marry guided Azami's hand to her mouth, letting the thermometer slide in.

Azami began to chew on it.

"No!" Marry tried to stop Azami from eating the mercury-filled glass.

She turned into a white kitten.

"Why am I-?"

* * *

Marry wasn't the only one having trouble with her eye ability.

Momo, the idol who usually can't keep eyes off her, was nowhere to be seen.

But yet, she was there.

Kido, on the other hand, was trying, for once in her life, to keep everyone from staring.

"I have a concert today! How do I perform when I'm a ghost!?"

Momo paced around, ignoring (as best as she now could) Kido's disgust at her word choice.

"This is bad! My manager is calling!"

The phone in Momo's hand chirped out Kisaragi Attention's chorus as a ringtone.

 _Aa, nandaka ike sou da! Shinzou ga hajikechau hodo..._

"I can't answer like this! Kido, you pick it up!"

"Moshi moshi. Kido Tsubomi here. Kisaragi-chan isn't here right now."

"When will she be back? We need her for her concert this afternoon!"

Kido sighed. When would Momo have her own eye ability back?

Why were they even switched?

Azami's fragile sneeze from upstairs answered the latter question.

"How long does it take to get rid of a cold?"

Kido had to hold the phone away from her when the manager shouted his reply.

"YOU LET HER GET SICK?!"

How could Kido explain that Momo was invisible because her friend's Medusa grandmother got a cold?

"Come by my office later. We'll discuss what do do."

Kido knew it was going to be a long day.

* * *

Hibiya had been sent to get groceries when his eye ability acted up for the first time.

He tried to use it to find the ice-cream aisle (they ran out of ice-cream quite recently, along with every other snack food they had), when he heard voices.

 _Out of my way, brat!_

 _Watch where you're going, hick boy!_

Hibiya glared at them.

"Keep your comments to yourself!"

 _Country rat's got a mouth on him, too. Some people's children!_

"Stop saying those things!"

People stared at the boy who seemed to be talking to himself.

Hibiya searched for a place without the voices...

Until he heard Hiyori's.

 _Was that Hibiya I heard back there?_

 _I wish he wouldn't be so annoying._

 _Oh well. He comes with few benefits._

 _Konoha likes his cooking, so I'll keep him around._

 _Konoha..._

 _He's just so sweet and hot!_

 _I wish I could get him to-_

Hibiya dropped his carton of eggs.

He ran to the sugar and flour aisle, hiding among a 2 kilogram bag of whole wheat flour.

And he cried.

Hiyori didn't seem to care for him...

But he liked her.

But she liked that amnesiac guy instead.

* * *

Shintaro woke up in a new place.

"Hey, I've seen this..."

He looked around, confused.

And then something clicked.

"ENE! YOU DIDN'T! I'M A CYBER GUY?!"

Ene was nowhere to be found.

Shin-kun sat among his own files.

The password on the screen proved where he was.

4510471.

His secret folder.

Then he heard Momo's desperate cries of "Why do I have Kido's ability?! Anyone else's! Anyone's!"

Of course, he thought Ene might have his, but he was wrong.

Shintaro realized that he had locked himself in with his password that stated "I do not work"...

"Eh, someone? Someone?! SOMEONE?!"

No one heard his yelling.

He unplugged his own speakers earlier to avoid the super annoying cyber-girl Ene.

He had condemned himself.

And he wasn't sure how to re-enter his body.

"DAMMIT, ENE! TELL ME HOW TO GO BACK INTO MYSELF!"

Silence.

"Is there a cyber cord that I can't see? One that connects me to myself?"

No reply.

"Come on, Ene! Tell me! Is this like some sort of cyber version of astral projection?"

Shintaro knew he was doomed to stay among his embarassing poems, unfinished songs, and "Master's Secret Folder" forever, or at least it seemed that long to him.

" 4510471! I do not work! Come on, computer! Let me out!"

* * *

Azami sneezed a couple more kitten sneezes.

"H-how am I cold? It's t-to w-warm in here..."

She still didn't understand the concept of being sick.

The thermometer, laying in a puddle of soaked tissues, was broken into shards.

The mercury globbed up in lumps.

"Marry. Get Tsukihiko.'

Marry, now a baby fox, looked up at Azami.

'He's been gone for-"

"Get Tsukihiko for me."

Marry knew that it'd be a while before her grandmother was okay again.

Did she really think Tsukihiko had returned?

Marry knew there was only one thing to do.

She left Azami alone.

...

"Azami! I'm here!"

Yes, Marry had used Kano's eye ability to become Tsukihiko...

Now she just had to avoid getting hurt.

* * *

 **That's the first chapter!**

 **I wanted to give you guys something as a Heat Haze gift, so this one will be split up into a few chapters!**

 **I hope all of you make it to the next chapter!**

 **Thanks to animefreak1980 for advice on this fic! You really helped me a lot! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

... ***Proceeds to beg for forgiveness at the feet of my readers***

 **Please forgive me for the wait! I'm sorry! I'll update more frequently!**

 **...**

 **Sorry it's been so long! I've been terribly busy with my first year of high school, but I finally found time to write!**

 **I haven't been on since the first chapter was posted- was it August 15th I posted that?**

 **Anyways, sorry to keep you all waiting! I'll try to update more frequently...**

 **Sorry if I mess up the name of the game Konoha starts playing. It's early, and I'm trying my best to be a morning person.**

* * *

"Haruka...? I was... Haruka."

Konoha looked at his reflection.

He had heard about the effects of Azami's cold on some of his friends.

 _Who has my ability? What ability do I have?_

He reached for his laptop, and began playing Dead Bullet -1984-.

"Hey, Takane!" He greeted his old friend as she walked by.

It was then that he realized what was going on.

"Hey, I _am_ Haruka!"

Konoha remembered that the guy in the red sweater could remember anything that's happened.

And suddenly, so could he.

"Takane! I remember! Isn't that great?" He beamed a wide smile at Takane Enomoto.

The girl simply looked at him with wide eyes.

"Who... are you?"

* * *

Kido walked through the doors of the manager's office, dodging people.

Somehow, she still thought that she had to avoid contact with people.

 _Why are they all staring? They can't see me. Maybe it's just a coincide-_

"Well, you could very well be an idol, Ma'am! What do you say?"

Kido gave a hateful glance at the man approaching her with a microphone.

"Everything will be fine. He can't see me. He's probably talking to someone else..."

"Can't see you?" The man grabbed Kido by the arm in what was supposed to be a friendly way.

"Of course I can see you! We all can! You're certainly drawing a lot of attention! Can you sing?"

Kido backed up slightly. "I-I d-don't sing." She wanted to punch the guy in the arm.

She pulled away from his grasp. "I'm here to speak to the manager of Momo Kisaragi. Can you please tell me where he may be?"

Soon, the reporter and Kido were on their way to the office of Momo's manager, but not without a lot of eyes turned their way...

 _How could I let this happen?_

* * *

"Tsukihiko?"

Azami grabbed onto Marry's arm. She actually believed that the person in front of her was Tsukihiko.

Ah, the wonders of Kano's eye ability...

"Hey, Azami! Long time, no see! I've missed you!"

Azami seemed to size up the pseudo-Tsukihiko, and when she deemed Marry's disguise true, she let go of his arm.

"Couldn't you have waited a little longer to run away?!" Azami, who was trying to sound intimidating, gave a tiny sneeze.

Marry laughed a little, knowing that the Medusa wasn't as tough as she'd like to think, especially when she's sick.

"You didn't have to leave me, did you? You better not leave on me again!"

Azami's eyes shined red, and Marry flinched.

 _Does she really think that Tsukihiko had a choice in dying?_

"Get Marry. I want her to meet you before you leave me again."

Azami pointed towards the door. "But if you don't come back, I truly won't forgive you this time."

With that, Azami threw an empty box of tissues at Marry, and the disguised girl ran out to find some way around this tough situation.

If "Tsukihiko" comes back without her, Azami will be mad.

But... if Tsukihiko didn't return, it'd break the poor medusa's heart.

 _What do I do?_

* * *

"Kano-san?"

Momo walked into a room where Kano seemed to laugh at nothing.

His face was bright red.

"Kano-san? I kinda need your help..."

Kano simply laughed more, holding his side.

"Ah, h-hold on, Kisaragi-channnn! Oh! This is too good!"

Momo looked quizzically at Kano.

"Ahhh, Kisaragi-chan, somehow I must've gotten someone else's eye ability!"

"Yeah. Same here. What're you laughing about? Did you get Seto's? Are you listening to Onii-chan's dirty thoughts?"

Momo wasn't sure if that was a bad idea or not.

"Not Seto's! C'mon, Kisaragi-chan? I told you whose ability I could've used! Remember- before we found Kuroha and he- you know!"

Momo thought about this for a moment.

"Hibiya's? No! Bad Kano-san!"

Momo hit Kano over the head.

"Hey, better than yours, Kisaragi-chan! At least I'm not a ghoooooossssstt!"

Kano simply laughed harder.

"Kano, this is serious! I have a concert soon! Help me!"

"Aah! Yeah, Kisaragi-chan! Sure! Oooh, this is too good!"

 _What've I gotten myself in to?_

* * *

 **... So, there it is. I think the next one will actually hit 1000 words.**

 **Did you guys like Chapter 2?**

 **Who would you like to see in the next chapter?**

 **Do you think the Mekakushi-dan hates me yet? (I hope they don't, but they probably do, lololol.)**


	3. Chapter 3

**So, is it true that Seto has a thing for using "-ssu" in his speech? 'Cause that's gonna be hard to replicate in English.**

 **I'll try my best.**

 **I know I had people wanting to see Seto introduced to the story, so this is his debut chapter!**

 **"-ssu"... How am I gonna write that? It's an informal version of "desu"...**

 **I'm gonna try using** _" 's"_ **in place of** _"it's, he's, she's"_ **if that's all right with you guys.**

 **It's not the best, but it's something.**

 **If you have any suggestions, please review or PM with the much needed solution...**

* * *

"Hey, Hibiya-kun! You in here?"

Seto searched through the aisles for Hibiya, who still hadn't returned with the groceries.

For once, he almost wished for his eye ability so he could read the kid's mind.

"If you hear me, shout out what aisle you're in, yeah?"

No reply came.

"Hibiya-kun? Man, he must've gotten lost."

Seto turned toward a worker who was restocking shelves.

"Hey, man, my friend is kinda nowhere to be found, y'know?"

The worker looked up. "Can I help you?"

"Yeah, 's a big store, and Hibiya-kun's never been here before. 'S all right if ya help me search, right?"

The worker looked straight up at Seto, freezing in place.

He was petrified.

"S-sorry! Hey, y'okay? Everything all right?"

Seto shook the worker, hoping that he wasn't really petrified after all.

 _Anyways, Marry didn't come with me! 'S not here to petrify that dude!_

As more workers came to the scene of the petrified man, more and more people became petrified.

Seto had no idea what was happening.

He didn't want to leave the frozen people in the aisle, even though he knew that they'd be fine soon enough.

But he still had to find Hibiya.

* * *

Shintaro sighed.

He practically lived on the internet, but this isn't how he wanted to do it.

He had spent his cybernetic journey so far trapped in his secret folder, and he desperately wanted to escape.

"Ugh. I can't even rename those folders that were named by Ene... _Pig's Feet_ and _Graveyard of S-_ "

Shintaro thought briefly to the 14th of August.

"Now I see why Ene bothers me... living on a computer's fine, but living in it SUCKS!"

Shintaro began wondering why he was talking to himself. No one could even hear him, so what was the point?

Suddenly, programs left open on his desktop began closing.

"No! No! Stop! I said 'sucks', not 'shut down'!"

Shintaro entered his password frantically.

"I've gotta get out of my secret folder! I'm gonna get ou-"

The screen of Shintaro Kisaragi's computer went black.

* * *

"You don't remember me, Takane? I was in your class!"

Haruka hoped that Ene was just trying to tease him.

 _Of course she remembers! She's just joking, right?_

"Who...?"

"Okay, Takane. You win, 'kay? Nice joke!"

"Who are...?"

Haruka took some time to wonder how to answer. Was he supposed to use his real name, or his gaming handle?

He decided against the latter, considering his recent experiences as Konoha.

"I'm Haruka Kokonose! I was in your class, remember! We were Tateyama-sensei's only students in that class!"

Takane considered this for a moment.

"Haruka..."

As Takane said his name, Haruka realized what was happening.

 _I have my memories._

 _Shintaro's eye ability gave them back to me._

 _That must mean... Takane has a different eye ability!_

 _Maybe she has... no._

 _Or maybe... that's not it._

"Hey, Takane, what eye ability do you have?"

"Eye...?"

Takane paused. "Takane...? Who is...?"

Haruka stared at her with wide eyes.

"You don't know who _Takane_ is? You're Takane! Unless you prefer to be called Ene, but you didn't like it when I called you that!"

Haruka suddenly realized what ability Takane Enomoto had.

It was his own.

* * *

 _What do I do?_

Marry, still disguised as Tsukihiko, was looking for a solution to a difficult problem.

 _If i could find Kano-san, maybe he could help! Kano-san has Kano-san's ability!_

The small medusa girl searched for the Deciever.

Kano still laughed at something only he could see, and Marry heard Momo's voice scolding him.

"Kano-san...?" Marry approached the boy.

Kano suddenly looked up at the Tsukihiko impostor.

"Ahhhhh, no way! Tsukihiko? Nee-chan told us about you from Mother's diary!"

Marry looked at the floor.

"About that..."

"Marry? You're-?"

Kano began laughing again, this time at Marry's new appearance.

"D-don't laugh at me! Tell me again about the time you pretended to be Ayano's body?"

Kano looked at Marry with a dead serious face.

"Marry, what is it you need, then?"

"You need to be me!"

Kano looked quizzically at the albino male in front of him.

"Ah, Marry! Sorry, but only you can be you right now! I kinda switched eye abilities... my bad!"

Marry remembered that to have Kano's ability, Kano had to have someone else's.

"Hey, Marry-chan?"

Momo's voice echoed near Marry's ear.

"Azami knows about the mix-up, right?"

"Yeah... I think..."

"Well, you could say that you have Kido's ability!"

"But I have Kano's... Oh! And you'll pretend to be me!"

Momo nodded, though no one seen her do so.

"Come on, Marry-chan! Let's make Azami happy!"

"You'll have to sound like me, though."

Momo smiled (still invisible to Kano and Marry).

"I can do that! I'm an idol! I work with my voice all the time!"

Kano stood up, sizing up Marry's disguise.

"Pretty good, Marry! I'm cominggggg with you, 'kay?"

Marry knew she was going to have a long day.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading! I'll post another chapter soon!**

 **So what did you guys think about this chapter? Who do you want to see in the next chapter?**

 **Next chapter will have another character debut in the story...**

 **I'm not gonna give any hints except that his birthday is on the 11th of a month, and his blood type is AB.**

 **Okay, I guess it shouldn't be that hard to figure out.**

 **But, anyways, who do you guys think it is?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Time for another chapter!**

 **My friend and I have to make a video game for an English class project in just two weeks...**

 **so I may not be able to update again until sometime near the end of May. Sorry...**

 **Anyways, I left some hints last time about a character coming into the story. It's (insert drumroll)...**

 **Kenjirou Tateyama!**

* * *

Kido's phone vibrated.

She was waiting to speak with Momo's manager, who was already speaking to someone else.

Kido didn't really care who it was. She just wanted to sort out Momo's problem.

"Hey! Kido, you've got to help me."

The girl in the iPod hoodie thought she heard a familiar voice through her earbuds.

The voice of an eighteen-year-old Hiki-NEET.

"Shintaro. Please call back later."

"Kido! I'm not calling! I'm IN YOUR PHONE."

Kido pulled her phone out of her pocket.

Inside her screen, Shintaro stared at the leader of the Mekakushi-dan.

"Whoa. I didn't expect..."

Kido sent one of her signature glares at the Cyber-Hiki-NEET.

"Is it that funny that I have your sister's ability? I didn't expect you to be in my phone either, so..."

Shintaro suppressed his laughter.

 _Kido draws people's eyes now? That's definitely a change._

 _"_ Oh, sorry, Kido. Why are you at Momo's manager's place?"

"I..."

"Becoming an idol? Come on. We've never even heard you sing. And I don't think acting's your thing, either..."

Kido had to remind herself not to crush her phone.

"I was going to say that I'm here to ask her manager to postpone the concert! I've already been to five different offices!"

"Five of them? No one knows where he is, huh?"

At this point, a tall man walked past the girl talking to the guy in a phone.

"Come on in, there! Waiting a long time?"

The man clicked a key into the door and swung it open carelessly.

"Yes, sir. Are you Momo Kisaragi's..."

Kido took another look at the man she knew all too well.

"K-Kenjirou?! Why are you here?!"

Kido punched Kenjirou in the arm before she realized what she was doing.

"Tsubomi-chan, I'm not Shuuya! You don't need to hurt me like thaaaatttt..."

"S-sorry."

Kenjirou adjusted his glasses.

"Actually, I'm filling in for the manager! So what's bothering you, Tsubomi?"

* * *

Seto carried the petrified people to the customer service desk.

They weighed much more than 130 apples.

"Hey! I've come to return your employees!"

The customer service worker glanced briefly at Seto carrying the bodies.

He laughed.

"I don't know what's going on! Why're you laughing! 'S not that funny!"

The black-haired customer service guy laughed again.

Seto tried to search for any distinguishing feature of the worker.

 _I've heard him before! That laugh... where did I hear it last?_

"Ah, Kousuke Seto... they look _petrified!_ Do you know what I'm thinking?"

"Not sure I do, really."

Seto tried to find the creepy guy's thoughts.

The guy reached toward Seto's neck.

 _I'm sure I've felt that hand on my neck before..._

The customer service worker brushed a fly off of Seto's neck.

"Huh? T-thanks?"

The guy turned away.

"If I'm stuck working customer service, I'd better do my job, right?

He seemed to be slightly bitter about this.

"'S not your... favorite job, huh?"

Golden eyes shot a mean look at Seto. Somehow, the man wasn't petrified.

"I thought the Queen _petrified_ people? Don't you _read minds_?"

"How'd you know? Wait... I know you!"

* * *

 **Sorry it's shorter. I promise the next one will be longer!**

 **Can you guys guess who the customer service guy is?**


End file.
